| | "Well guess who ended things and now we're not even friends anymore" I said to Ariel on stage. "What? Really?" she said to me. "Yeah...I feel terrible. I texted him saying how I really didnt want to do this but thought it was best if i stayed out of his life and he said that would be best." "Wow surprising", she responded. Black Nate was sitting around with us and was like to me "wait. boyfriend? husband? fiance?" "Not even boyfriend" Ariel said back. "I can tell you look upset...its in your face. Fuck that guy. You're 19. You shouldn't be upset over some guy. Fuck him" "You wouldn't be saying that if you knew who I was talking about". "Who?" and we tell him who it is. "What? HIM? FUCK HIM. FUCK HIM. You shouldn't be crying over him. You're 19!!"
I made the hardest decision in my life. I know I made the right choice, but somehow I still feel terrible about making it. I just lost a really good friend- but I can't deal with his baggage anymore. I can't deal with being treated like somebody he is dating, but has no feelings for me. He can't have the best of both worlds with me-- it's not fair to me at all.
Black Nate made a good point this evening. I am just 19. I should be having fun, not being in a relationship. Not getting so involved with somebody who will never ever put that same amount of involvement back.
I know I made the right choice, but I don't understand why I feel so bad about it.
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| | Posted 7/12/2008 2:36 AM - 15 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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